Friday, July 9, 2010

How BABY LIES Hurt Babies

The Babywise book recommends the biological opposite of a mother's natural hormone-driven response. Women in general are more "touchy-feely" than men and seek close emotional attachments with others. Mothers also have hormonal reasons for seeking emotional attachments, especially with their babies.

1.Ezzo puts limitations on the relationships in the hope of raising a moral child. He warns against carrying a baby "too much" and giving it too much attention.

2. Ezzo limits feedings.
The book tells parents to start with a schedule on Day One, putting the newborn on a 2 1/2 to three-hour schedule. This may seem reasonable, but biology dictates otherwise. The best way to feed a newborn, fresh from his continuous intrauterine nutrient supply, is early and often. To limit the length or the frequency from day one is a mistake that will affect long term breastfeeding success. Many mothers who follow the Ezzo schedule do well for the first few months, but suddenly around 4-5 months it becomes apparent that their milk supply has dwindled and baby is starving.

3. Ezzo manipulates nap times.
Baby is to be put in the crib, tired or not, where he must learn to fall asleep on schedule. Even if he cried for an hour and has only been asleep 20 minutes, baby is to be woken from his short nap for a scheduled feed.

4. Ezzo is indifferent to a baby's crying. The book explains how to put limits on feedings and limits on naptimes, but then insists parents do nothing to limit the baby's crying.
Notice that? Ezzo limits those times which are generally pleasant, calming experiences for babies (nursing and sleeping) but any amount of distress and crying is acceptable.

PHYSICAL PROBLEMS:

Malnutrition:
1. A mother feeding on demand will generally nurse 10 - 12 times per day. The Parent-Directed Feeding schedule limits the number of daily feedings to 8 - 9.5 times. A baby deprived of up to four feedings a day will be hungrier than its demand-fed neighbour.
2. Not only that, but the Ezzo baby will spend up to 4 hours a day crying himself to sleep. Crying uses calories.
3. The PDF baby whose crying doesn't bring feedings and whose feedings are limited no longer will cry when hungry as it becomes accustomed to the lesser milk supply. This shows up on the scales around 4-6 months of age, when the baby finally seems to have settled into the routine.

Emotional Neglect:
1) Since their cries are not answered anyway, they stop crying.

2) Mothers become so accustomed to ignoring the baby's crying that they actually stop hearing it. The mother may actually believe her baby is sleeping through the night because she has trained herself not to hear it. This occurs the same way we stop noticing a clock chiming every hour, or traffic sounds when you live on a busy street, or a rooster crowing at dawn when you live on a farm.

3) A common emotional defense mechanism for feelings of hopelessness is sleep. Babies who cannot deal with their feelings of despair will shut down. Adults suffering from depression often sleep excessive amounts. Sadly, for the Babywised infant, excessive sleeping is seen as proof of how well the Babywise system 'works.'

5 comments:

  1. What a fantastic Blog. I will direct anyone I meet who is thinking of using these techniques here.

    Thanks.

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  2. Great Blog! I know to many moms who practice this and think they are training their infants to "self soothe".

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  3. I am not a Babywise fan in even the slightest way. BUT, have you read the book? I mean, the newest edition. I've not read the older one, but from what I've heard it was even worse than the newer one. But what you're saying about the book isn't correct. For example, he doesn't say start a feeding schedule from day one. He says start it a week or two in (which is still nuts, mind you). And he doesn't say put them down for a nap whether they are sleepy or not, he says to look for signs of sleepiness and lay them down before they get overly tired. I'm not going to stand up for Ezzo. But I do think that if we are going to criticize something we need to make sure we have the facts. Which is why I read the book. I wanted to know what I stood against and why. Not that I will ever be reading it again! Ha! Gross.

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  4. I was going by my 1998 copy. I also have a '93 copy, the Preparation for Parenthood book and tapes, Preparation for the toddler years, Babywise II, and Anne Marie's childbirth book.

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  5. Babywise '98 Page 107 Chapter 6 "Establishing Your Baby's Routine"
    The chapter begins as follows:

    Day one. There's no better time to begin thinking about your baby's routine. while all the pieces may not fall into place for another three or four days, you should still be thinking abot your long-term strategy now. ...

    2nd paragraph:
    For the firsty week, consistently achieving this sequence with your newborn may seem an insurmountable task. ... Attepmts to keep awake this sweet bundle simple are not successful.... Wakefulness is a goal to strive toward,. Exercise the effort now toward giving full feedings and by week two your baby most likely will fall into a predictable feed/wake/sleep routine.

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